A senior colleague at my office shared this picture with us. The picture was taken at the Peshawar airport’s Domestic arrival lounge. I thought it was pretty funny, particularly because you don’t see signs like these here in Pakistan.
What is that one thing that you cannot possibly compromise on when you are looking for a life partner? Is it looks? Is it intelligence? Is it personal worth or finances? Is it parents approval? or is there something else.
I am married, so I have made my choice. It was made easy by the fact that me and my wife got along so well before marriage. We connected on a deeper level. We were introduced through family and friends, but we ended up together because of what we thought about each other and how we made each other feel when we talked or when we were together.
I wanted someone who appreciated me for who I am and would support what I do. But the one thing I wanted above all else was for her to be talkative. I am a quiet sort and wanted someone who was opposite in that regard so that we would get along. Some, maybe even most, would think that I am mad for asking for a wife who was talkative, but that was what I wanted and that is what I got and I don’t regret my decision.
I am frustrated and angered by the way this nation acts on the roads during rush hours, when traffic is at its peak. It doesn’t matter which city or which road you are talking about; the problem prevails everywhere. Yet, I don’t understand the reasons for it. What could it possibly be that makes us act like selfish, uncivilized, and illiterate fools devoid of logic and reason. It couldn’t be the lack of education, because even literate people follow the herd. Could it be inadequate road networks? I don’t think so, cuz be it a main road with four to five lanes or a side lane with just two lanes, the problem is every where. What is it that makes us so impatient?
Getting home from work is a struggle every single day because of the traffic. But who do we blame for it? Do we blame the people, who cause the mess? Do we blame the traffic police who are unable to manage the flow of traffic? Or do we blame the government for not providing adequate mass transport solution for the city? How can this madness end? Does anyone have any answer? Is there anybody else who cares?
I started this blog a long time ago, in May last year, mainly as an outlet for my feelings and frustrations. I couldn’t really come up with a good name for the blog and using my own name just felt corny, so I came up with “My Bad…”
I am sure you must have heard this phrase before. When I first heard I thought it made no sense; it felt incomplete. But then even I started using it. And when I wanted a name for the Blog, it just somehow felt right. I am mostly giving my opinion and I make no apologies, but i also want to warn people who read this blog, thus i came up with My Bad.
I have now decided to change the title as I no longer like it.
I was a very shy person all my life. I still am, but not as much as I was as a kid and teenager and even as a young adult. I used to keep to myself and only talked to people if they talked to me. As you could imagine, I had few friends in school. A good way to make new friends for someone like me was to get pen friends. I am talking about the early 90s. Cell phones were not wide spread and there was no internet. So I advertised in the paper that I was looking for pen friends and sure enough I got a lot of responses. I made several friends, but only one friendship endured the test of time. We were friends for at least 12 years. I say were, because we had a fight of sorts and we are not friends anymore.
This got me thinking about friendship. What makes an enduring friendship? I have been married for over two years and I love my wife very much, but I also consider her my friend. A friend to me is someone you share your life with. Someone who is there through the good times and bad. Someone who doesn’t judge you and accepts you as you are. Someone who helps you through life. All these hold true for your spouse as well, with the addition that you get to have sex with them as well.
I made a very classic mistake of thinking that what I had with my pen friend was more than friendship and I was wrong. And that ruined our friendship. It was not the same since. And even though we got in touch after a long time again, there were still a lot of issues relating to what I had said and it was mutually agreed, not so amicably, that the friendship was over.
I don’t regret the fact that I am not friends with her anymore (yes the pen friend was a she) I just regret the fact that I lost a very good friend who was there for me when I needed and who helped me through the tough times in my life. I owe a great deal to her and I just wish I had not crossed that fine line; maybe things would have been different.
But I strongly believe that whatever happens in life, happens for a reason that we sometimes cannot understand. I believe in the grander scheme of things and that every small moment helps you get to your goal that God has envisioned for you. You may not understand, you may not even like it, but that’s the way it is. And that holds true for for your friendships as well.
What is it that you hate? What consumes you with foot stomping, fire breathing, steam-out-the-ears rage?
I hate a lot of things; getting late when it’s no fault of mine, people mis-committing or lying, getting stuck in traffic, not being able to get a third helping of my favourite dish cuz I am already full. But what I hate with the core of my heart… is having to drive at night. The reason… the idiots who use high beam when driving. As if that was not enough, some morons have halogen lights installed that are more suited to stadiums than cars.
Why do you need it? Every car has two variations to the headlights. One for city driving and one for highways; as far as I know that is. The high beam has a more upward trajectory and a farther reach because on highways the speeds are such that if anything comes in your way suddenly out of the night, you won’t be able to see it in time to hit the brakes. But what is the need for high beam on city roads? I just can’t understand.
Then there are the halogen lights; also referred to as fog lights. We don’t have fog here in Karachi. Granted most of the streets are unlit due to either an absence of street lights, or KESC‘s ‘load shedding’… But even then. It is OK when you are all alone on the road, but if there is traffic, then you need to be courteous enough to swith to a low beam so that other commuters can also see the road and not be blinded.
Lately, even motor cycles and auto rickshaws have started using these halogen lights. Iam usually a very calm and composed person, but this really gets to me. I wish people were more considerate of others; this country would be a lot better to live in then.
I was reading an interesting post on wedding traditions/ superstitions from around the and one tradition especially caught my eye. Read below:
One to three days before the wedding, Indian women have henna—a natural and temporary dye––tattoos applied to their hands and feet in elaborate patterns. The ceremonious application can take hours and, oftentimes, the groom’s initials are hidden in the detailing for him to find on their wedding night. If he finds them, the couple will have good luck, and if he can’t he must give his bride a gift.
Here in Pakistan brides put henna or mehndi on their hands (sometimes up till the elbows and above) and feet. But the part about the groom’s name being hidden in the patterns is new to me. It makes for an interesting wedding night though.
The gift to the bride is also tradition but it has no caveats. It is however traditional among some to give the wife a gift when both husband & wife are first alone in their bedroom.
Another superstition attached to the application of henna is that if the color of the mehndi appears dark, it means that the husband loves the wife very much; there is no vice versa though.